


Hoarder Pearl

by BJ_Noteworthy



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, F/F, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-19
Updated: 2015-07-19
Packaged: 2018-04-10 04:21:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4377011
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BJ_Noteworthy/pseuds/BJ_Noteworthy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>its not rly too pearlmethyst, its rly casual, but kinda obvious theyre together kinda. Anyway this's about Pearl being a fucking hoarder??? She literally is. She doesnt have her gem to pull out random crap in the Human AU so hows she gonna be a smartass and bring out convenient items??</p><p>hoarder via closet in place of gem</p><p>im bad at titles</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hoarder Pearl

**Author's Note:**

> short and sweet, also
> 
> specifically i had to write 83 and c at some point in this fic because im being an ass today and bothering my friend with >:3c emoticons. im

Pearl, the self-proclaimed most clean and organized person of Delmarva, the tidiest nitpicky woman, had a terrible secret. Though she didn’t see it as a burden, or even a flaw in her organization habits until it was brought up.  
In Pearl’s household she lay with Amethyst on the couch. The girls were just cuddling as they do, when Amethyst began to get sidetracked. She stretched her foot out, tapping it against a lamp on the coffee table. Pearl payed no attention, as she silently ran her fingers through Amethyst’s hair. Suddenly a loud noise made both of them jump. Pearl looked down to see a chip of the lamp had broken off.

“AAaaugh, Amethyst!”

Amethyst shrugged defensively, “I didn’t know what I was kicking against!”  
Pearl rolled off the couch, marching out of the living room, “It’s fine, I have just the thing to fix it. I’m certain of it.”

Amethyst followed warily behind, curious as to where Pearl was off to. She followed her to a closet door against the wall. It was small, and didn’t look useful in the least. She stared questioningly, until Pearl opened the door, hundreds of items spilling out from the stuffed closet and littering the floor at their feet. Pearl leaned into the closet casually, like this was just an everyday thing. She leaned her knee on a throw pillow and began rummaging into the depths of various items.

Amethyst stood in shock, with her jaw dropped open. Eventually she snapped out if, immediately questioning Pearl, “What is this?!”

Pearl’s entire left arm was buried, and she grunted a response, “Oh you’ll see” She only assumed Amethyst was referring to the item she was searching for.

Amethyst crossed her arms, “So you nag at me for not being organized, and having a messy method for clearing my stuff, but it’s okay for you to have this-…” She paused, still taking in the unbelievable sight. “This shit hole??”

Pearl’s eyebrow quirked, “What? No, this is just my storage space Amethyst, for convenient items to be at hand.” She quickly yanked at a wrapped up hot-glue gun. “Ahah! See, I knew I would need this one day.” Pearl handed the gun to Amethyst, and swiftly swiped all the items back into the closet along with the door. She seemed awfully practiced at this.

Amethyst stared at the closet and back at Pearl, “Holy shit, P.”

Pearl took the tool from Amethyst’s hand and walked off to fix up her damaged lamp. “What?”  
Pearl seemed to be genuinely curious as to why Amethyst was in such a shocked state.

“You’re such a fucking hoarder” Amethyst bluntly replied.

The accusation took Pearl by surprise, “A what- Me? Oh no no no.”

“Yes, you!” Amethyst pointed a finger at Pearl. “Why do you need to stock up on so much shit? Do you even use half that stuff on a daily basis? And why do I get yelled at for being unorganized when you have a hoarder’s closet smack-dab in your own home?!”

Pearl glared at Amethyst, “This is nothing like your messy ‘system’ you keep. I have all my necessary items all stocked up in one place, so I know where they are when I need them.”

“I’m pretty sure I saw like, 83 corks in there, what do you need that many corks for?”

Pearl opened her mouth, and slowly shut it. She shrugged, “ I mean.. well, you never know-..wine..?”

Amethyst sighed, walking to Pearl and picking up the gun, which was now hot enough to fix her mess. “It’s alright that you’re not a little miss perfect, P.” Amethyst waved a chunk of lamp in front of Pearl to demonstrate her point, “No one is.”

As Amethyst took care of her own mistake, Pearl finally began to realize her own. “Oh..oh my.” She fell onto the couch, running her hands over her face and into her hair,

“Jesus Christ, I’m a hoarder.”


End file.
